Psychics were recruited by the Ministry of Defence to locate Osama Bin Laden's secret lair, it was claimed yesterday.18,000 Pounds? Cheapskates.
Newly declassified documents revealed that the MoD conducted an experiment to see if volunteers could 'see' objects hidden inside an envelope.
It is claimed the ministry hoped positive results would allow it to use psychics to 'remotely view' Bin Laden's base and also to find weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.
However, after running up a bill of £18,000 of taxpayers' money, defence chiefs concluded there was 'little value' in using psychic powers in the defence of the nation and the research was taken no further.
Bush created a brand new multi-billion dollar Department, filled it up with the nation's finest collection of high-paid third-string losers... the kind that get their jollies off stomping around in black outfits and ski masks, the kind that practice legalized murder on Idaho loners and Texas cults, the kind that can actually spend billions more looking for Osama everywhere but where he actually is. (Bush and company know where he is--the third-stringers aren't that stupid, but catching him would be really bad for Bush's "Warn Tear".)
Obviously, the Brits need to learn a bit more, need to spend a lot more, and learn how to keep those embarrassing little failures secret.
They need to enroll in the Bush supported and funded Homeland Department School of Useless Excess.
More than anything, they need to learn the Bush philosophy that pulling out of a hopeless quagmire is a sign of weakness.
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